Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Little things.

I made dinner for my friend tonight. Our boys played and we sat at the kitchen table and talked of her new life. The one without her husband.

It overwhelmed me when I walked through their front door. Overwhelmed me with tears. Took my breath away.

"You know what I am gonna miss?" she asked, "The way he drank a coke. It never seemed to touch his lips. I always asked him how he did it. I am gonna miss seeing that."

"You know what I will miss?" I said, "The flicker in his eyes when he smiled at me. He was genuine. So sincere. Just a little flicker that I would miss if I weren't paying attention."

"You know what else? The way his hand felt. The grooves." she said.

"It really is the small things, huh?" I asked. "The small details. The small things that seem silly. That is what we miss when someone is gone. Nothing big. Just the small things."

We cried. We laughed. We cried some more. We tried to make sense of the senseless things. We talked of the future. We talked of the past. We talked of a magical rewind button. We talked of what ifs. And of many, many small things.

Pay attention my friends. The small things are what matter. The details that are easy to overlook. The moments that seem too silly to make note of. That is the living that one misses. That is the thing that makes one ache to the bone, knowing that the hum will not be heard. The tap of the foot that shook the table will not be felt. The cold feet in the night. Seeing the keys tossed on the table. The movement of the hands.

Little things.



lindiepindie said...

I'm sure it is a comfort that you feel his loss so strongly. In this time of feeling alone, she's not alone - and I'm sure that means a lot. God bless you both as you travel this journey together.

RANDI said...

Wiping away tears...

This post is beautiful, Lyn. Thank you so much for the reminder today. Your friend is blessed that you are walking this road with her--in the end you will both be blessed!

Islandsparrow said...

I am so glad that you are able to talk and laugh and cry together. You are so right - it is the little things. I remember when my dad died I saw his work gloves on the shelf in the closet and burst into tears. God bless and comfort you and your friend

beck said...

i was very glad i was able to visit with you guys, even if it was only for a little while. you know you both live in my thoughts and i was honored to have shared a few bits of her future plans. as hard as i know it is for everyone, thank you for letting me in to share it all.

Kate said...

As I read this, I kept hearing the song "How can I help you say Goodbye" by Patty Loveless. Having each other - you are both truly blessed. What a treasure you are to her.

Islandsparrow said...

Thinking of you this morning Lyn and saying a prayer for you, your friend and her family.

RANDI said...

Hi Lyn,

I couldn't get this to work through email, so here it is in your comments!! ;)


Hi Lyn,

Here is a link to the fabric (I am kind of guessing because I don't have anymore--maybe your sis will be able to tell!)

If that is not it, click this link and it should be somewhere on this page:

I hope that helps!